We’ve been singing a song at church recently and this morning I could not get the chorus out of my mind. In fact, I was singing the chorus quietly all round Costco as I shopped.
At the cross, You beckon me
You draw me gently to my knees
And I am lost for words, so lost in love
I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered
I was talking to God about it during our time together first thing this morning: considering the phrase ‘wholly surrendered’ and if I were a complete hypocrite when I sang it. He showed me that no, I absolutely and totally mean it when I am in worship, singing my confession when I am One on one with Him or in prayer with others. At my very core, it is true. At the Cross, I am sweetly broken and wholly surrendered to Him.
But then I walk away back to my life and it becomes… less true.
So we talked about that and He showed me it’s not as less true as it was but not anywhere near ‘wholly’ all the time. And that was OK.
It was OK not because He’s unconcerned with the rest of my life but because He ‘gently’ draws me. I heard on the radio as I drove to the store that we will not be perfectly sinless until we join Jesus in eternity either through death or the second coming. I agree with that because this flesh in which I live is fatally flawed. But He gently draws me to leave more and more of it at the foot of the cross and walk away with more and more of Him. Changed and filled to be His witness, His child, His.
So we ended with my prayer for more of Him and less of me. That the sweet breaking and total surrender will linger with me. That the intimate communion we share in those times I make time for will continue in the store, on the road, in the kitchen, at the gym, around the TV, here in front of my PC and everywhere else you can think of.
because your old life is dead and gone. Your new life is now hidden, enmeshed with the Anointed who is in God.
A promise and a challenge.