I forget too often that I am not an equal partner in this relationship. I forget that my God is Supreme. I forget that He is Creator of all things. I forget that He holds all things in being. I forget that He is a God of more power and majesty than I can ever even begin to imagine. I forget that it is only because of His grace and mercy that I continue to even exist.
I forget because He loves me utterly and with a passion beyond my wildest dreams. I forget because I can call Him Abba. I forget because I only see Him in part, His Glory and Holiness would be too much for these mortal eyes. I forget because of that same grace and mercy.
There is only one God, the Eternal;
worship Him with respect and awe;
take delight in Him and tremble.
The psalmist explains it so well there. The tension, the balance between worshipping and loving God the Majestic and God my Father. I didn’t distinguish a response between them. Both aspects deserve my love and demand my worship because, in a way that I can’t understand, He is totally both. So I take delight in that love, in the blessings He pours out and I tremble because I know it is only by His hand, by His grace and that I am unworthy without it.
Some might read this and scoff at me – weakling, inadequate, relying on an imaginary crutch. I would nod and agree with all of that except the imaginary part. I, in myself, am weak, inadequate and need a crutch. I am not ashamed of needing help. Neither am I ashamed of loving and following the God who loved me enough to save me.