Checking In.

This blog is very much like my journal, a place where I’m always honest. I’ve chosen to share with you and that’s hard sometimes, being aware some people who I actually know are reading this and I’m now accountable to them. But that’s also good. It’s good to be accountable to others, that’s why God puts us in families, why He made churches where we are in loving relationships with each other.

So a couple of weeks ago I wrote about being in God’s presence, about just sitting there and ways to stay there. It’s been constantly on my mind – when I’ve let it, and the alarm on my phone has gone off faithfully. I, however, have not been as faithful in pursuing it. The phone bleeps when I’m mid something and I ignore it. Or I don’t hear it at all, or any number of excuses. Sometimes they’re valid but they are never good enough. It’s not the specific time, it’s the purpose and I let it slip.

The awesomely good news is that God hasn’t stopped wanting me to be in His presence. He hasn’t got a faithless heart or let Himself be distracted. He is still 100% focused on me 100% of the time.

“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
    and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
Though she may forget,
    I will not forget you!

Isaiah 49:15

God is speaking to Israel there, but the promise holds for me too. He never stops loving me, wanting the best for me and the best for me is to abide in Him. John 15 is full of promises: that if I remain, abide, in Him I’ll grow, bear fruit, be like Him, be able to ask God and be answered, love, stand. It ends with the promise of the Holy Spirit. Jesus knew people, He knew our weaknesses and the way we fail and knew we would need help to live as He wishes us to; to live the way God intended from the start. The Holy Spirit is that help, more help than we could ever ask or imagine. Nothing I’ve written here is new, I’ve written much of it before, more than once. I’ve heard it from God more than once. My prayer is that this time it sinks in a little more deeply.

Being honest I have changed, a lot in the last few months. The scratchy voice  of my enemy accuses: I am not perfect and the silky voice of my flesh soothes: I am good enough. But the still small voice of the Spirit smiles at me saying ‘you have been changed and there is change to come; you are loved and redeemed.’ That’s the voice I want, need, to listen to. So as you love me and feel led feel free to check up on me and remind me of the course I am running. See if my eyes are on the prize.

I dare you to! Because if you do, you’ll have to check yourself too cos you’ll be running right alongside me! Let’s encourage each other in this marathon rather than criticise and judge ourselves and let’s always keep our eyes fixed on Jesus and our ears attuned to His Spirit.

2 thoughts on “Checking In.

  1. I love today’s blog and as one of those who know and love you, affirm the truth of what you say. I see changes and I know there are more to come. Mia culpe. Your honesty is good and so helpful so keep blogging on.


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